A Loving God.

"One of the most unloving things God could do would be to allow you to live in sin and operate under the illusion that you’re still close to Him." -Pastor Steven Furtick
 
Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. Ephesians 4: 14-15

The Lord has been bringing to my attention over the past six months or so that I was becoming a bitter person. It wasn's something that I allowed everyone to see and I often didn't feel the need to open up that part of me to anyone other than my husband. When I would hear the word bitter, I would coil up and almost feel sick because I knew it was true.

The truth is, we live in a sinful world. Even people we expect to be the most uplifting will hurt you. People can cut so deep you feel like you will never recover. Not only do people hurt me, I am guilty of hurting people as well. Everyone has hurt someone else's feelings whether it was intentional or not.

After seeking the Lord for months, the time had come for the nasty and hard part. That is called forgiveness. I call it nasty because it can be hard to admit you still need to forgive someone when it has been months or even years of consistent hurt. I knew that I was close to the Lord working a miracle and the Lord rescued me from my bitterness after listening to message that I know the Lord prepared for me to hear on this day.

Pastor Steven Furtick preached a sermon series called How To Hug A Vampire. We have all been vampires because we have all hurt people. Pastor Steven invited Mark Driscoll to come and share a word in May 2012.  I listened to the message again this morning and heard these awesome and weight-lifting truthes.

1. You either choose forgiveness or bitterness
2. Forgiveness is a miracle-it's not something you do for someone else. It's something that Christ does in us and through us.
3. Bitterness is a tree-it has roots that must be dug up
4. We can't do it alone

Forgiveness is:
Not pouring out your wrath on someone else
Being set free from their offense and setting them free
Wanting the best for the other person
It's all through Christ

Forgiveness is Not:
Denying the sin
Forgetting
Reconciliation-things may not go back to the way they were and that is ok
It's not regaining trust

I feel like often times, we as believers say, "YOU must forgive others!" and we leave out the part, "You must forgive others and it can only be done through Christ and it is a process." It was also such a relief to take the pressure off of myself to make things "normal". That is not a truth about forgiveness. We can cause ourselves a lot of anxiety if we put that pressure on ourselves. The Lord has the power to restore, but it's up to him and it MUST be done through him.

I know this revealed a lot about my heart but it's so good for the soul to recognize sin. I am so grateful that the Lord loves me enough to call me out on sin and not leave me the same! Praise Jesus!