Blessings!

As I type, my sweet husband is on the way to his first day (or night!) of work as a police officer. He graduated yesterday as part of the 164th class of the CMPD traning academy. I am so proud of him. He has endured six months of intense academic and physical training. He went from being a college student to a lean mean fighting machine before my eyes! I can't help but be so incredibly proud of his dedication. I can't even describe how blessed I feel. The Lord has provided everything we need and more. He knows how to give to his children! A year ago we weren't sure if we were going to go overseas, join Campus Crusade, or some other endeavor:) The Lord made it clear that he wanted us to serve the people of Charlotte. Both of us. The Lord has open to door for us to share the gospel and minister to many people around us. He has provided an awesome church with people that push us closer to Him. I have never been one to give up control easily. However, I have learned that if you let go and trust, He will provide and it will be better than you could have ever imagined! I promise.

I am so thankful for the leadership of these two men in my life. They point me back to Christ when I am ready to give in!

A Loving God.

"One of the most unloving things God could do would be to allow you to live in sin and operate under the illusion that you’re still close to Him." -Pastor Steven Furtick
 
Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. Ephesians 4: 14-15

The Lord has been bringing to my attention over the past six months or so that I was becoming a bitter person. It wasn's something that I allowed everyone to see and I often didn't feel the need to open up that part of me to anyone other than my husband. When I would hear the word bitter, I would coil up and almost feel sick because I knew it was true.

The truth is, we live in a sinful world. Even people we expect to be the most uplifting will hurt you. People can cut so deep you feel like you will never recover. Not only do people hurt me, I am guilty of hurting people as well. Everyone has hurt someone else's feelings whether it was intentional or not.

After seeking the Lord for months, the time had come for the nasty and hard part. That is called forgiveness. I call it nasty because it can be hard to admit you still need to forgive someone when it has been months or even years of consistent hurt. I knew that I was close to the Lord working a miracle and the Lord rescued me from my bitterness after listening to message that I know the Lord prepared for me to hear on this day.

Pastor Steven Furtick preached a sermon series called How To Hug A Vampire. We have all been vampires because we have all hurt people. Pastor Steven invited Mark Driscoll to come and share a word in May 2012.  I listened to the message again this morning and heard these awesome and weight-lifting truthes.

1. You either choose forgiveness or bitterness
2. Forgiveness is a miracle-it's not something you do for someone else. It's something that Christ does in us and through us.
3. Bitterness is a tree-it has roots that must be dug up
4. We can't do it alone

Forgiveness is:
Not pouring out your wrath on someone else
Being set free from their offense and setting them free
Wanting the best for the other person
It's all through Christ

Forgiveness is Not:
Denying the sin
Forgetting
Reconciliation-things may not go back to the way they were and that is ok
It's not regaining trust

I feel like often times, we as believers say, "YOU must forgive others!" and we leave out the part, "You must forgive others and it can only be done through Christ and it is a process." It was also such a relief to take the pressure off of myself to make things "normal". That is not a truth about forgiveness. We can cause ourselves a lot of anxiety if we put that pressure on ourselves. The Lord has the power to restore, but it's up to him and it MUST be done through him.

I know this revealed a lot about my heart but it's so good for the soul to recognize sin. I am so grateful that the Lord loves me enough to call me out on sin and not leave me the same! Praise Jesus!

When He Calls...

He will equip.

Then the Lord said to Moses, "See, I have chosen Bezalel son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah, and I have filled him with the Spirit of God, with wisdom, with understanding, with all kinds of skills-to make artistic designs for work in gold, silver, and bronze, to cut and set stones, to work in wood, and to engage in all kinds of crafts. Moreover, I have appointed Oholiab son of Ahisamak, of the tribe of Dan, to help him. Also I have given ability to all the skilled workers to make everything I have commanded you..."
Exodus 31:1-6

While reading through the instructions that God had for Moses to build the tabernacle, I felt overwhelmed. There were so many DETAILED instructions. Surely there were mistakes! I mean, they were normal people, not artists. Then I came to Exodus 31 and it all made sense. They didn't have to do it on their own. The Lord appointed specific people and gave them specific skills. When the Lord calls us and gives us instructions, he doesn't leave us on our own. He will provide us with the skills needed. Moses did not have the skills to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, but the Lord called him. He equipped him. Our God is good.

Banner Year

Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far the Lord has helped us." 1 Samuel 7:12

I often change this to, "Thus far the Lord has helped me", when pondering this scripture.

The past several weeks our pastor has led us through a series called Banner Years. At first I thought it sounded weird. What is a banner year? It seemed over my head. However, it was exactly what I needed to hear. I learned that EVERY year can be a banner year. It depends on your perspective. Some of the things Pastor Steven discussed were trusting the Lord with finances, examining what our "scoreboard" is "scoring". Is it scoring how we are pleasing man or how are taking the gospel to the lost. A banner year is a year that you consider successful. I was really challenged by this. I could easily (and I do often) look at this past year as being a barren year. I had two bad flares. Out of 12 months, I was on steroids for 6 of them which caused me to gain around 25 pounds. I endured severe pain for a month. It was hard financially. I loved my first year of teaching but it was very stressful.

Truthfully, however, it was a banner year. The Lord provided a wonderful job with wonderful kids during a terrible economy. We never went hungry (clearly!:)) The Lord provided everything we needed. We traveled to SK. The best, however, was the eternal perspective I gained while laying in bed for weeks. It can't even be described in words. I only see the vision in my head. My pastor and my egroup challenged me to reflect on how the Lord has helped. Wow. It is amazing. Have you had a banner year?:)

The Church

The Church
Elevation Worship

We are the change
the world is waiting for
We've got a love
the world is desperate for
We will lead
and take to your streets
Now's the time for us to rise
and carry hope and let love shine
and show this world that mercy is alive
Now's the time for us to rise
and carry hope to hopeless eyes
and show this world that mercy is alive

We're not afraidwe will abandon all
to hear your name
on lips across the world
we will run
in the wake of your love

Fill our hearts with your compassion
let our love be active here

     This past weekend, I was able to go to Charleston with the women in my family. The women in my family are very diverse in their opinions about pretty much everything in life:) While listening and disscussing many different issues with my family, the Lord continued to open my eyes about many things. There are people hurting around us. I mean REALLY hurting. It could be depression, relationship issues, a health problem, and many things I cant even think of. If you are hanging out around the church, you know there are hurting people inside. But what about those who don't know Jesus? They are hurting and hopeless. If you are a believer, you may be in a difficult situation, but you have the almighty God carrying you through. What if you were walking alone in this world?
     Before I went to work as a teacher, I knew little of the hurt and hopelessness in this world. I was surrounded by believers in college. We worshipped and prayed together. On occasion, we would go out on campus and find people to share the gospel with. Afterwards, you felt like you could check something off of the list.
     Now, I am around quite a few non-believers. People who are clueless to the love of Christ. They want to be rescued but don't even know what they need to be rescued from. Instead of filling our hearts with concern for these people, we spend our time concerned with whether or not someone else in the church is being "godly" enough. We criticize other believers for what they are wearing to church or what type of music they are listening to. I am so guilty of this! I love how this song describes how the church should be. I have been challenged this fall to analyze what in my life is holding me back from reaching the lost. Should I have 3 or 4 kids if I want to be intentional in reaching into other's lives? Should I aspire to be a stay at home mom one day or stay at work? I so do not have the answers to these questions but I have been challenged to think about them. How can we be the church the world is waiting for?

Why didn't you come sooner?

"Beneath the Waters"
Hillsong Cornerstone

This is my revelation
Christ Jesus crucified
Salvation through repentance
At the cross on which He died

I will rise, I will rise
As Christ was raised to life
Now in Him, now in Him
I live

Now hear my absolution
Forgiveness for my sin
And I sink beneath the waters
That Christ was buried in

I will rise, I will rise
As Christ was raised to life
Now in Him, now in Him
I live

I stand a new creation
Baptized in blood and fire
No fear of condemnation
By faith I'm justified
I rise as You are risen
Declare Your rule and reign
My life confess Your Lordship
And glorify Your Name
Your Word it stands eternal
Your Kingdom knows no end
Your praise goes on forever
An on and on again

No power can stand against You
No curse assault Your throne
No one can steal Your glory
For it is Yours alone
I stand to sing Your praises
I stand to testify
For I was dead in my sin

I will rise, I will rise
As Christ was raised to life
Now in Him, now in Him
I live
     I've already mentioned the book Undaunted in another post but WHOA is the Lord speaking to me through this book! I just wanted to share a story from the chapter that I read last night. Christine describes a night that her and her friends were lost in one of Australia's rainforests. Her description seemed miserable. She was cold, hungry, and the worst part about it was that no one knew that they were lost. I figured she was using the story as an illustration but when I got to that illustration, I was blown away. One of her friends decided to leave the rest of the group to look for help. It was a huge risk for him to go by himself. The boy came back the next morning with help. The feeling of being saved was incredible. A feeling that she would never forget. But she took it a step further. The Lord wants to save EVERY soul. We need to remember what its like to be unable to get out of the dark on our own. We as believers need to hold in our hearts the feeling of being saved and remember what it was like to be lost.
     Christine and her husband rescue girls who are sex slaves in Europe. One girl asked her why she had not come sooner. Wow! This causes tears for me and I do NOT cry easily. Do I look at every lost person like that. Why am I not coming sooner? Do I not remember what it was like to be lost? The Lord has used Caine to remind me that no rescue can come soon enough!

Here I am, Lord. Send me! Isaiah 6:8

Encouraged

This fall I have been able to read a couple of books that have really encouraged me in my relationship with the Lord. My amazing pastor, Steven Furtick, wrote a book called Greater based on the life of Elisha. He challenges us to pray for the Lord to reveal what is holding us back from complete surrender to Him and to start acting instead of sitting on our behinds. Bradley and I read this together and with our egroup.

 

The other book I read this fall was by another amazing preacher, Christine Caine. She and her husband started a ministry in Europe to rescue girls who are sex slaves and build them up in a life in Christ. They also have another ministry called Project Europe which focuses on training believers in Europe to become leaders. The Lord has given me a love for Europe so when I heard this it quickly caught my attention. The book undaunted teaches about how to face fear. If you are looking for a good read, check these out!!